Resources for Defending Marriage as One
Man and One Woman
And how laws promoting true marriage do not
discriminate in an unfair way against homosexuals, gays, lesbians,
transgenders, or bisexuals, LGBT 's.
Marriage Reality : How to win the argument by
focusing on the good of children. Excerpts by William B. May,
Catholic Online Resources on
The Meaning Of Marriage – Extensive and High Quality
Free MP3 at Catholic dot Com
Secular Case Against Gay Marriage -
This is an article by Adam
Kolasinski, who is a doctoral student in financial economics at
MIT. It is one of the best I have read.
77 Non-Religious Reasons to Support Man/Woman Marriage
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar2kzJ-FkpUBelow are the answers, depending on the
objection made that many of her arguments can be levied
Order Copies for wider distribution and readability
- "Adoption is a child-centered institution to give
children the parents they need, not an adult-centered
institution to give adults the children they want.
- Adoption is usually a response to an unavoidable
tragedy. We should not go around creating the conditions
that are otherwise understood to be tragic.
- If biology is really unimportant, then let’s save
ourselves some money and trouble and stop tagging the
babies in the hospital. If you come in with a baby, you
go out with a baby. It doesn’t matter which one!"
Courage is an international apostolate of the Catholic Church, which
ministers to persons with same-sex attractions.
Children of gay and lesbian parents write letter of support to
Traditional Marriage, and Dolce, Gabbana
“Sex Change” and Gender
Walt Heyer (rhymes with higher) underwent a “Sex Change”
surgery. And he explains the unforeseen problems with those
surgeries and how they do not cure the real psychological issues
that lie underneath the emotions. He made a full podcast
interview, which appeared on May 29, 2015, can be heard here:
An abridged version of that interview is
Transgender Delusion: A Testimony,
His website is
U.S. Constitution’s Preamble Upholds Traditional Marriage,
by Dennis Bonnette
Are kids just as well off with same-sex parents? Maybe not, studies say
Meet the Opponents of San Francisco's Archbishop | Matthew Schmitz |
"Sex Change" Surgery: What You Should Know
From Love, By Love, For Love
Lighthouse CD by Fr. Michael Schmitz
Vatican’s Cardinal Burke: DOMA decision will ‘destroy our
culture,’ lead to ‘death’
Clearing up the confusion: New film sheds light on beauty, truth of
DVD, Featured in the film are Cardinal Raymond Burke,
Patron of the Sovereign Military Order of Malta, and Bishop Mark
Davies of Shrewsbury.
Making Wise Medical Decisions is Not Bruce Jenner’s Forte
by Joseph Schaeffer
The Ongoing Dictatorship of Relativism
by Jeff Morrow
Why Same-Sex Couples Possess No Conjugal Rights
by Joseph Arias
San Francisco Protesters Redefine Catholicism
by Nicholas Senz
A somewhat related article about what happens
when morals are abandoned:
A Psychiatrist's Letter to Young People About 50 Shades of Grey
by Miriam Grossman, M.D.
Dr. Morse’s remarks re: a Marriage
The essential public purpose of marriage is to
attach mothers and fathers to their children and to one another.
To see the importance of this purpose, we must take the perspective
of the child: What is owed to the child?
Unlike adults, the child does not need autonomy or independence. The
child is entitled to a relationship with and care from both of the
people who brought him into being. Therefore, the child has a
legitimate interest in the stability of his parents’ union. But no
child can defend these entitlements himself. Nor is it adequate to
make restitution after these rights have been violated. The child’s
rights to care and relationship must be supported pro-actively,
before harm is done, for those rights to be protected at all.
Marriage is adult society’s institutional structure for protecting
the legitimate interests of children. Without this public purpose,
we would not need marriage as a distinct social institution.
We often hear the objection that some marriages don’t have children.
This is perfectly true. However, every child has parents. Depriving
a child of relationships with his or her parents is
an injustice to the child, and should not
be done without some compelling or unavoidable reason. …
And treating different things differently is not discrimination.
… marriage becomes nothing but a government registry of friendships,
a pointless legal convention that frankly doesn’t deserve any
government benefits or recognition at all.
… same sex marriage is the vehicle that separates children from a
… sperm donors … uncomfortable questions about their origins, and
complex emotions about being partially purchased.
The Distress of Same-Sex Attraction
by Jennifer Roback Morse, Ph.D
“ In a 1998 study in Pediatrics, students with six or more sexual
partners in their life were 7.62 more likely to be classified as
“GLB” (gay, lesbian, bisexual) than were students who had never had
sexual intercourse. Of the self-identified same-sex attracted youth,
25% had used cocaine in the last 30 days and 22% had used injected
drugs, compared with under 3% of straight youth.
Study finds children of same
sex couples lag in school
… “Children of same sex couples are significantly less likely to
make normal progress through school than other children: 35% less
likely than the children of heterosexual married parents, 23% less
likely than the children of never married mothers, and 15% less
likely than the children of cohabiting parents.”
Discussing Marriage :Bringing Reason and Civility
to the Marriage Debate
Meaning of Marriage
The Catholic Church, Children and Same-Sex Parenting
by Jennifer Roback Morse
“Secure attachments between a child and each of
his or her parents builds the foundation for the development of the
child’s personality. In the child’s little world, mother and father
are the most powerful and important people in their lives. Parents
act as “stand-ins” for God himself.”
What Marriage Is and Isn't, and What to Expect from a Redefinition
Even the new definition of marriage will quickly be deemed
discriminatory against other sexual perversions
An atheist identifies 'the central problem with the gay marriage agenda'
by Carl E. Olson
Archbishop Cordileone states the case for preserving the definition of
[Listen to a Podcast of this article]
Archbishop Salvatore J. Cordileone
Are you a child of a painful divorce? Tell us your story
Marriage, Same-Sex Relationships and the Catholic Church
by Bishop Thomas J. Paprocki
Up on Same Sex Marriage
By Jennifer Roback Morse
Scroll down and see
Protecting Marriage as a Conjugal Union Is Not Analogous to Racism
Al Kresta has a great
Marriage Resource Page
with lots of links including these
How can we talk about it?
Greg Popcak, co-host of More2Life on Ave Maria Radio, says the focus
discussion should be on children.
Catholic Stand has put together a list of
answers to questions commonly posed by advocates of same-sex marriage.
Bill May of Catholics for the Common Good says that it’s time to
stop defending marriage and reintroduce it.
Gay Marriage advocates often say that love is without gender.
Check out Al’s response to this argument.
As well as this article
We speak the truth in love to all on same-sex marriage.
See more links here
Pope Francis Defends Human Nature Against Gender Radicals
Priests must not be silent on marriage referendum
St. Pope John
Paul II & Pope Benedict on Gay Marriage:
‘Clear and Emphatic Opposition is a Duty’
For The Doctrine Of The Faith :
Considerations Regarding Proposals To Give Legal Recognition To Unions
Between Homosexual Persons
Exorcism Quotes Pope:
Gay ‘Marriage’ is From Satan, 'Father of Lies’
Lighthouse CD -
How to Talk About Same Sex Marriage
He gives great effective tips. For example,
instead of saying that
a child needs A mother and a father, say that
a child need His mother and father.
This is so much easier to defend and so much to the point.
How to Talk About Marriage and Same-Sex Unions
Sharing Faith at Gay Parade ,
Here are some good resources on fighting porn.
Myths About Pornography - You Tube - Matt Fradd:
Catholic Diocese of Arlington
Neuroscience has proved that porn is literally making
men’s brains more childish.
Porn Derails Deep Relationship Instincts
One video compares porn to drug addiction. It explained how a mouse
would keep pressing a lever for more Dopamine drug, while ignoring food,
female rats, etc until the rat eventually died.
The Science behind Pornography
President Of Catholic
Supreme Court Decision On Marriage “A Tragic Error”
The U.S. Supreme Court decision, June 26, 2015 interpreting the U.S.
Constitution to require all states to license and recognize same-sex
“marriage” “is a tragic error that harms the common good and most
vulnerable among us,” said Archbishop Joseph E. Kurtz … president of the
U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB). … Mandating marriage
redefinition across the country is a tragic error that harms the common
good and most vulnerable among us, especially children. … Jesus Christ,
with great love, taught unambiguously that from the beginning marriage
is the lifelong union of one man and one woman. (USCCB)
The Meaning of Marriage by Irish
Married love is a unique form of love
between a man and woman which has a special benefit for the
whole of society…. To seek to re-define the nature of marriage
would be to undermine it as the fundamental building block of
our society. …
God’s Plan for Marriage
The Book of Genesis … Catholic Church clearly teaches that
people who are homosexual must always be treated with
sensitivity, compassion and respect. …
The debate at the core of the call for ‘same sex marriage’ is
not about equality or about the separation of a religious view
of marriage from a civil view of marriage. It is about the very
nature of marriage itself and the importance society places on
the role of mothers and fathers in bringing up children. With
others, the Catholic Church will continue to hold that the
differences between a man and woman are not accidental to
marriage but fundamental to it and children have a natural right
to a mother and a father and that this is the best environment
for them where possible. It is therefore deserving of special
recognition and promotion by the State.
The meaning of marriage
Marriage is a unique relationship different from all others. …
orientated to the generation of new life.
… ‘marriage of a woman and a man is a fundamental building block
of society which makes a unique and irreplaceable contribution
to the common good and to society as well. It is therefore
deserving of special recognition and promotion by the State’.
Why is marriage so important?
This committed, married love provides a stable and nurturing
environment for children.
… A major challenge arises from any proposal which seeks to
redefine the meaning and purpose of marriage on which the family
is founded, … Any such proposal is based on the assumption that
the institution of marriage … has nothing unique about it and on
the assumption that marriage can be stripped of that social
standing without obscuring its irreplaceable social role.
… is no longer to be seen as the foundation of society.
Protecting marriage is a matter of justice
…. Without protection and support for the unique place of
marriage in society, the State could, in effect, deprive
children of the right to a mother and father.
Religious and non-religious people alike have long acknowledged
and know from their experience that the family, based on the
marriage of a woman and a man, is the best and ideal place for
children. It is a fundamental building block of society which
makes a unique and irreplaceable contribution to the common
good. It is therefore deserving of special recognition and
promotion by the State.
Proposals to change the meaning of marriage effectively say to
parents, children and society that the State should not, and
will not, promote any normative or ideal family environment for
raising children. It therefore implies that the biological bond
and natural ties between a child and its mother and father have
no intrinsic value for the child or for society. As Pope Francis
stated recently, ‘We must reaffirm the right of children to grow
up in a family with a father and a mother …
The Sacrament of Marriage
… The love of God is eternally faithful and reliable. Married
love seeks to reflect that love as a faithful, unbreakable
relationship. Because it is a sacrament, marriage brings about
and deepens the love it reflects. With the couple living the
sacrament of marriage, their children are enriched by their
sharing in God’s love.
…. Every family has its problems.
But instead of beginning with the problems and challenges, we
might begin by reflecting on the meaning of marriage as a
sacrament and the blessing that it can be to the couple and to
... The love of Christ for us, which marriage reflects, led him
to betrayal, abandonment by friends and agonising death on a
cross. But that was also the path that led him and leads us to
the fulfilment where ‘Death will be no more; mourning and crying
and pain will be no more’ (Rev 21:4) and where God will make all
things new. …
we ask that the principle of equality not be undermined by
applying it inappropriately to two fundamentally different types
of relationship. Marriage is a unique relationship different
from all others for a reason.
The family is experiencing a profound cultural crisis, as are
all communities and social bonds. … Marriage now tends to be
viewed as a form of mere emotional satisfaction that can be
constructed in any way or modified at will. But the
indispensible contribution of marriage to society transcends the
feelings and momentary needs of the couple….
FROM THE PASTOR
July 5, 2015
by Fr. George W. Rutler
The Supreme Court’s
abuse of its authority in the decision
redefining marriage as an institution based
on feelings rather than fact and sanctioning
deviancy as a civil right was expected, but
the surprise was its sentimental
substitution of nihilistic narcissism for
jurisprudence, expressed in an amorphous
substitute for English diction. This passed
a death sentence on Christian culture, just
as Roe v. Wade sanctioned the
deaths of millions of infants.
As Christ rose from the dead, so can our
nation, but only the cynic and the naïf will
deny that the next steps will be attacks on
Christ himself in his Church, schools and
charitable institutions. It can’t happen
here? That is what the English said before
1534 and the French before 1789 and the
Russians before 1917 and the Germans before
1923. Now is the time of trial predicted by
Christ. Not all will be brave enough to
endure the persecutions predicted by Christ,
though great will be the reward for those
who bring their white robes of Christian
dignity “unstained into the everlasting life
Pope Francis has said, “Same-sex marriage
is not simply a political struggle, but it
is an attempt to destroy God’s plan. It is a
move of the ‘father of lies’ who seeks to
confuse and deceive the children of God.”
The President of the United States
Conference of Catholic Bishops declared that
the narrow vote of the Supreme Court “is a
tragic error that harms the common good and
most vulnerable among us.” Chesterton wrote
in 1926: “The next great heresy is going to
be simply an attack on morality, and
especially on sexual morality.” In 2008,
Sister Lucia, who believed that she saw the
Mother of Christ at Fatima, told Cardinal
Caffarra: “The final confrontation between
the Lord and Satan will be over family and
marriage.” Injustice takes a harsh toll, but
it cannot last, whereas “justice is eternal”
I yield my column to some lines from the
dissenting opinion of Justice Scalia, who is
Catholic in practice as well as in name:
A system of government
that makes the People subordinate to a
committee of nine unelected lawyers does not
deserve to be called a democracy. . . . Four
of the nine are natives of New York City. .
. . The five Justices who compose today’s
majority are entirely comfortable concluding
that every State violated the Constitution
for all of the 135 years between the
Fourteenth Amendment’s ratification and
Massachusetts’ permitting of same-sex
marriages in 2003. They have discovered in
the Fourteenth Amendment a “fundamental
right” overlooked by every person alive at
the time of ratification, and almost
everyone else in the time since. . . . The
opinion is couched in a style that is as
pretentious as its content is egotistic. . .
. The Supreme Court of the United States has
descended from the disciplined legal
reasoning of John Marshall and Joseph Story
to the mystical aphorisms of the fortune
cookie. . . . With each decision of ours
that takes from the People a question
properly left to them—with each decision
that is unabashedly based not on law, but on
the “reasoned judgment” of a bare majority
of this Court—we move one step closer to
being reminded of our impotence.
Marriage Reality : How to focus
the discussion. Excerpts by William B. May
Witnessing the reality of marriage
William May writes that the state has a big
stake in protecting traditional marriage . .
Mozilla’s Brendan Eichs was not the first person to
lose his job for supporting marriage, but he was the most senior and
most prominent to do so. Attacked for having given $1,000 to support
California’s Proposition 8 six years ago, he was forced to resign 10
days after becoming CEO.
With judges redefining marriage across the country
and an increasing campaign of intimidation by secularists, how can
faithful Catholics witness the truth about marriage …
More fundamentally, why are we talking about same-sex couples in the
defense of marriage anyway? How can that help reveal the reality of
marriage? The term same-sex “marriage” was a trap laid by opponents to
frame the debate. To support marriage, one must be against the sincere
aspirations of same-sex couples. Notice, measures to protect marriage
are framed as bans on same-sex “marriage.” That leads judges,
legislators and many in the public to think we are simply motivated by
prejudice and bigotry against homosexuals. Never use that term.
So how do we express the reality of marriage in non-religious terms?
Marriage cannot be defined, only described. How it’s described is
critical to how it’s understood. The Catechism describes marriage as
“the intimate community of life and love” (#1603). Pope Benedict XVI
described it as an icon of the Trinity, and St. John Paul II as a
communion of man and woman leading to a communion between parent and
child. Many remember the “love” part but have forgotten “life.”
When the reality of God’s plan for creation was recognized by the
state, a civil institution was created that specifically united children
with their mothers and fathers. This is a fact that doesn’t depend on
revelation or belief in God. It simply is. Not all married men and women
have children, but every child has a mother and father. …
The attack on Brendan Eichs was so outrageous that people on both
sides defended him. Rather than being silent, what if he said, “My
concern is not about relationships between same-sex couples, but the
fact that redefining marriage eliminates the only institution that
unites kids with their moms and dads. Our moms and dads are part of our
identity. Today, there are too many fatherless children with tragic
human consequences. Half of children born to women under 30 are outside
marriage — and 71% of high school drop outs, 85% children with
behavioral disorders, 63% youth suicides, 71% teen pregnancies, 70%
juveniles in state rehab, 90% of homeless and runaway children are all
from fatherless homes. How can anyone justify eliminating this
Obviously these questions are just the beginning of a new discussion.
We don’t know if such a response would have saved Eichs’ job, but it
would certainly have clarified his motivation and perhaps even started
the discussion about the reality of marriage that must take place.
Life Matters: Explaining the Reality of Marriage to Family And
By William B. May
The breakdown of marriage has reached crisis mode.
Today more than 50 percent of births to women under 30 occur outside
marriage. According to sociologists, the increased numbers of children
in poverty, in fatherless homes, and who experience abuse and neglect
all relate to changing attitudes about marriage. The phenomenon of the
breakdown of marriage has spread rapidly into the segment known as
Middle America and is now touching nearly every extended family.
Frequently Asked Questions by Engaged Couples
Why Married Parents Are Important for Children
Some answers from the Social Sciences:
- Children raised in intact married families:
are more likely to attend college
are physically and emotionally healthier
are less likely to be physically or sexually abused
are less likely to use drugs or alcohol and to commit delinquent
have a decreased risk of divorcing when they get married
are less likely to become pregnant/impregnate someone as a teenager
- Children receive gender specific support from
having a mother and a father. Research shows that particular roles
of mothers (e.g., to nurture) and fathers (e.g., to discipline), as
well as complex biologically rooted interactions, are important for
the development of boys and girls (Marriage and the Public Good: Ten
- A child living with a single mother is 14
times more likely to suffer serious physical abuse than is a child
living with married biological parents. A child whose mother
cohabits with a man other than the childís father is 33 times more
likely to suffer serious physical child abuse
We need to use language that
reveals truth instead of vulnerable vague terms that allow others to
reinforce their lies. We need to continue the fight till marriage once
again becomes a privileged institution that unites children with their
mothers and fathers.”
To advance the conversation without making
ourselves vulnerable to misinterpretation and slanderous attacks we will
do better to avoid using the following terms;
Instead, we should use the term “Marriage Reality.”
We dare to be different and defiant in a positive way.
Here are a few examples of this approach:
- We define ourselves by being
for marriage reality, not by being opposed
to the lie of “same-sex marriage.” The “gay rights”
movement wanted the debate to be about them. Why cooperate by using
their terminology that obscures reality? Resist.
Become defiant. Being
opposed to “same-sex marriage” made us come across as uncaring and
insensitive in front of our children, and risk being stereotyped as
bigots or full of hate. Instead, respectfully demand an answer to
the truth revealing question, “Do we need a civil
institution that unites kids with their moms and dads?”
- We are for marriage
reality, not “traditional marriage,” which
portrays marriage as a construct based on the past and not about the
future. We know that marriage is not a man-made institution but is
an integral part of God’s plan for creation as the Church teaches.
“Marriage reality” more precisely express how marriage is described
in Scripture and in the Catechism. Let’s communicate this.
- We are for training and encouraging
the formation of local support groups to educate
people on how to spot tricks and lies that confuse our children, how
to bring clarity to every conversation based on reality (truth). For
example, a tactic opponents are teaching our children and friends is
to shift the conversation to families with same-sex parents. That is
subterfuge. In reality, that has nothing to do with marriage, the
only institution that unites kids with their moms and dads.
… This is not merely about learning how to win an argument, but
witnessing the truth so our family members can understand it and repeat
Fight harmful ideas with realities
For example, the Church does not teach
marriage is good for children or children deserve or need a mother and a
father. These are ideas that lead to conflict over what a child needs
and what is good rather than revealing truth about marriage. Instead,
the Church teaches the child has a fundamental human right to be born
into a family with mom and dad united in marriage because it is there
that the child can discover his own identity. That is not just an idea,
but a fact- a reality.
The Catholics for
the Common Good Way
4. Always be in solidarity with victims (never
in opposition to perceived opponents or victimizers). (see
Achieving Solidarity with Victims through Christ)
For example, in the work of evangelization of culture for marriage
and family, who are the victims of the breakdown of marriage or the
distorted view of love, marriage, and human sexuality?
- Children who are deprived of the right to be
born into a family with a married mother and father,
- Children and young adults taught falsely about
love, marriage, and human sexuality that negatively influence the
choices they make in life.
5. Become love, even to our detractors
Reality-Based Thinking, An Antidote for Relativism
Questions that Focus on Reality
Consequences that no one would desire.
Would you like for your children to be single
Would you like for your grand-child to grow up in a
single family home?
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